Isn't having someone to turn to, hold on to, laugh with and share good and bad times with, the whole purpose of focusing your energy into loving just one person (at a time)?
Someone might turn around and say to me.. "when you're swamped with work or uni, you wouldn't have time to give them all the attention and love they truly deserve, which is why i would want to let go before it becomes an issue"....HA...hahhaha....someone give this guy/girl a parachute, they just want to get off...heck...do them a favour and suggest the no parachute option as well. :)...just kidding..On the real though, anyone who needs as much hand holding or cuddling or re-assurance would definitely be more of a hindrance to you anyways...
But again, it's a thing about perspective and the character or maturity of the person you're dating. feeling Love is more of a state of mind than an actual signed document. think about it, you say you love me but i can never really truly honestly know if in your heart of hearts its just words. Some folks are really great actors so they pull off doing the accompanying gestures and the stuff that makes you believe it. But can you really search someones mind and heart to know the real truth or emotions behind their words?...in my opinion...i'd say the answer to that is "NO". That's why i said "FEELING LOVED" is more of a state of mind. it has a little to do with the sayer and everything to do with the hearer.
There's something comforting about knowing you're loved. The person may not have all the time in the world to spend with you but the 5 minutes they spare, could feel like a life time. Life doesn't give you chunks of time with which you can do what you please. As a matter of fact, if people waited for truck loads of time, nothing would ever get done. Carpe diem..You seize the moment as and when you get it.
For the busy guys/girls, you seize one minute from brushing your teeth, 5 minutes of snooze time, 2 minutes of eating time, 3 minutes of bathing time and 15 mins of television time . That's a whooping 25 mins you've got to communicate with those you love, say hi, find out how they are doing, remind them that even in the busiest of times/schedules, you still think about them enough to make out this time for them.
Someone would again point out "That's the problem, having to juggle a busy schedule and yet still having to make room for one more"...hehehe....for this guy/girl, buy them a parrot !! :). Dont think they realise how selfish such a statement is...news flash...ITS NOT ALL ABOUT YOU !
On the plus side, i think love gives us more focus than it does distract. You find yourself wanting to be a better person that your love interest would be proud of. You push yourself because you know its what they expect of you. You want to be better, brighter, smarter...just so you've got good feedback. Being in love is having someone to be accountable to. Someone who would be there to remind you about why you do what you do incase you forget it in the hustle and bustle of your life. It's having someone who knows you enough to encourage you when they can see your strength waning. It's having someone who shares your dream so you don't have to feel alone or do it all by yourself.
oohh...what joy when you cross each individual milestone in your life and you can look back and you see a glaring smile from the one you love, letting you know that even though you didn't believe it, they were there to believe it for you. "I always knew you could do it" they'd say.
I think Life is not an individual race as we'd like to think it is. Struggles are personal but life....life encompasses everything that happens around you, including those happening around you. If you can deal with nagging lecturers and friends who party all night then you've got time for love. If you can deal with those annoying work buddies whom you've got no choice but to share your coffee break with, then you've got time for love. If you've got things you set aside for your personal time just so you have something for you, then you've got time for love. You don't realise it but you make sacrifices everyday. You do things reluctantly because its expected of you by someone else. You make choices that favour someone else but inconveniences you slightly because its a habit. Why does a love sacrifice have to be nay different?
You always make time for the things you care about, including football matches and trips to the salon. Why not love? Why is it a distraction when you have to focus attention on someone else and yet a necessity when its your own personal ish being sorted?
My opinion is simple. Having someone love you whom you love in return is never a distraction. Its what keeps you grounded. Its what encourages you to be a better person. It is what motivates you to do a little better than you usually would do. It's an integral part of having a well balanced emotional and mental life.
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