Don't be Selfish

if i were to describe men in one word, my first choice would be "selfish". if i had to chose another word, i'd go with "clueless". If you gave me a third shot, i reckon "unnecessarily complicated". This is not a male bashing piece in any form....i got too many wonderful men in my life to be one-track but i just have to know if there's anyone out there who has ever wondered or thought the way am thinking right now.

When i say men are selfish, i don't mean they are go-getters who stop at nothing to accomplish their goals...i say selfish because men seem to honestly believe that words without actions should mean something to us just because we are female. I reckon they think "if i say i love you, that should tide her over for while"....and i wouldnt need to make sacrifices that "cramp my style".

Thats when you notice that common courtesy's such as responding to a text message, phone call or even email seems like a girl is asking for too much. She complains so he says "Oh my God, just because i dont email you doesnt mean i wasn't or haven't been thinking about you"......news flash guys: "Thoughts don't bless people......words +actions DO"

is it too much for someone you are suppose to care about to reach out to you for some affection? is it wrong for someone who loves you on purpose to look forward to receiving some of that love back? is it wrong for anyone to ask you to make them feel special every now and again.....?

I'd tell you why you see it as such a task....because "you are selfish". If you can't take a minute out of your day to say "hi"...or even ask "how are you doing".....you're selfish. if you know someone cares about you and values anything you give to them....and you cant step outside yourself for a second to say "Just thought about you so said to say hi"...you're selfish. If all you do is receive lovely calls, text messages, emails that put a smile on your face and yet you think a smiley face sent to her blackberry messenger counts for something..."you're selfish".

Caring about someone is not a tug of war. It's not a chore that you grumble about having to do. As a matter of fact, if she even needs to ask you for it....then it means someone has only been thinking about themselves far too long. If you really dont care about her or want her to care about you....say it. Do what you have to do till she gets it.....but please oo please ...o please for the love of God.....Don't say you care about someone if all you ever do is take take take...

As females, you already know we work by words of affirmation and acts of service. if you say you care, we expect you to show you care...if we have to ask you to care...how do you think that makes us feel? needing to ask someone to care for us?... The one person you care about takes you for granted! When we ask you to do things for us, so we can smile and feel loved by you, you cuss...act like we are asking for too much, feeling you've done enough or alot...you cant possibly give anymore....what were you thinking ???

You've totally ignored the second rule: "You need to love people the way they want to be loved". Love is not about you...it not about you getting what you get....its about you giving way more than you are receiving. It's about agreeing to think of someone else before you think about yourself. i know women can be selfish and very self-seeking too........but that is not an okay sign to ignore what you have a responsibility to.

Someone who loves you and cares about you by choice........that's not a joke. it's not something to play about with. Do you know how many people walk around looking for someone to love them, care about, show them that they want and need them????................And here you are, getting someones precious time and emotions for free and you cant step aside from yourself long enough to show appreciation ... especially because you want it to continue.

People who love and care about you by choice....are not always going to be there if you keep acting like its your right. You are an investment that needs to yield returns otherwise you become a dead end. Don't take someone's ''emotions''...if you don't intend to give them the full benefit of yourself.....Don't be Selfish !!