So, second half of my week, unlike the other disaster, this one turned out quite good. Depending on how you look at it that is ;).
A friend of mine, has been liking this girl from afar...over 10 months worth of liking. Always watched as she talked to people, loving the smile she gave them, listening to the voice while she spoke to them, ....okay yea,,,sounds kinda stalker-ish but..that's not the moral of the story :).
For some reason, he decided yesterday was the day he was going to ask her out. Waited until class was over and i have never seen a grown man pace the floor as much as he did. You gotta understand, dude is someone i would describe as very sarcastic but funny, nice but withdrawn, interesting but quite dark... :). All remarkable qualities especially for him. i've never seen him so unsure of himself...ever.... He turned pink in his nose, his cheeks, his hands, his neck........and he looks like a polar bear on a normal day, so he looked wwayyy cute while having his panic attack. :)
he felt like "NO..i cant do this...forget about it...what was i thinking..."....and there i was shouting..."common..you can do it.....Bad Boy: ride or die !....You only have shot, make it count......! ...You make never get this opportunity!...carpe Diem !!!" i swear i used every cliche statement i could think of. Ofcourse it didn't help that people kept on stopping her to say a few words which kept stopping him in his tracks and making me do over-time.....
Finally....she was alone. He jogged up to her...called out her name...and she stopped. Now this is my recall from a spectator point of view...i dont read minds or lips....but my mind couldn't resist acting the movie..
Hi "~"...How are you?
she says "i'm fine thanks. havent seen you around in a while. where have you been hiding"
He says "not hiding, jsut admiring from afar"
she "blushes"...looks down at her shoes briefly as she swings her body back and forth
he continues "after this semester, we'd be done for good. any plans....?"
she says "well, i'm thinking of xyz but i guess not set in stone yet"
He says "so i was wondering "~", would you like to have coffee sometime?...i know we havent had a chance to chat much but i would really be happy if you'd say say"
she blushes again "sure, i'd like that very much. okay well, it was nice chatting with you"
He says "my pleasure. see you next week"
They both say bye and head in opposite directions.
However, i was briefed later on ..and this was how it actually played out !!!
He shouts out her name "#"
she turns around
she says "how do you know my name?"
he says "we've been having the same class since january in ## and ##"
she says "oh"
he says "i was wondering if you'd like to have coffee sometime"
she says "sure"
They both say bye and head in opposite directions.
Now..... i didnt realize that errmmm..well..he had never said a word to her before that day and that......he knew she may say yes to coffee but chances of the day ever happening a re kinda 0-1 but i couldnt help but admire his courage.
I felt his heart before he spoke to her...and i swear it was fighting to get out of his chest. it really is a nerve wrecking experience when you step out of yourself for a minute, brace your fears and just put yourself out there. At some point when i was delivering my cliche speech, he said to me "it's easier said than done"...Boy is he right.
it was soo easy for me to say...."Fuck it..just do it...what's the worst that could happen?"... but i am far too much of a chicken to follow my own advice. He saw someone he liked. He knew something may or may not come out of it...but he decided even if it was for a minute, it was worth it....for her to look him straight in the eye, talk to HIM, Look at HIM, see HIM and offer a smile at HIM-----for a minute. It was certainly worth every 60 second of it. You gotta love his bravery.
The chicken in me has never faced such a worthy fear. One reason is that i've probably never liked someone enough for such a reason to apply. On second thoughts, even though that statement could once have been true, i do like someone...and as easy as we flow and talk and laugh.....the chicken in me, just refuses to hatch.
Some might call it fear of the unknown, fear of rejection, unwillingness to be vulnerable, indecisiveness about what is expected or should be the outcome of such confession...the list goes on and on and on and on....... but i still appreciate braveness when i see it....and look forward to the day where i can step out of myself....and finally brace uncertainty...hoping in a strange way, uncertainty braces me back or atleast offers me a pillow...!!!
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